6 NFL Coaches that should be Fired (that won’t be)

Posted by HyperLithium

January 7, 2009

6. Dick Jauron - Buffalo Bill

Let me say I was all over this guy’s nut sack like a barnacle on a cruise liner last year. The Bills, last year, managed to be extremely competitive while scraping together a team with random people from Ottawa. 2008 was a totally different world for Jauron. Buffalo did lose it’s starting QB and went back to, as a colleague puts it, JP LOSERman but they didn’t take advantage of their running game the way a good team should have. I also have not seen a team that never appeared to have any type of “edge” like these guys were missing and that really cost them some games. In addition to the above, Jauron took the blame for a horribly bad play call that definitely cost the Bills a game. Jauron will stay because the owner is too much of a pussy to make a change right now. JauronaGO!

5. Jack Del Rio - Jacksonville Jaguars

Here’s another guy that had a team this year that was totally different from last year’s. David Garrard was the talk of the league, the Jags D was tough as nails, and there was nothing but praise. This year Del Rio has retreated to arguing with the Defense’s best player, Mike Peterson, over a sack celebration and benching him to prove a point. What that hell is this, 4th grade? Del Rio needs to avoid pissing matches, especially when Peterson was trying to provide a spark when the Jags never could even get started. Del Rio will probably stay this year because I bet this owner and GM are afraid he’d beat the piss out of them. Jacks needs to be ripped.

4. Marvin Lewis - Cinncinati Bengals
Look, before everyone starts, this is a MERCY firing. Who in their right mind wants to coach for Mike Brown right now? Probably the same list of candidates that want to coach for the Raiders Al Davis. Marvin Lewis was constantly undermined by Mike Brown (ala Chris Henry’s re-hiring) and is certainly no where near the same page. TJ Houshmanzadeh had the best season of ANY of the Bengals offensive players and Mike Brown says he won’t resign him because it is their policy to not re-sign wide receivers 30 or older. Marvin Lewis is praying right now he gets fired, I guarantee it. Mercy carvin’ for Marvin.

A great Manning story is that Jeff Saturday questioned his play call in practice when Manning was a rookie and Peyton’s response was “If I tell you it’s Easter you’d better damn well start looking for eggs!”

3. Wade Phillips - Dallas Cowboys

Gee, I feel like I don’t even have to type anything else. The Cowboys are everywhere in the media and that gave ample opportunity for Phillips to show off his callow demeanor in press conferences. After the season Phillips said “I guess I have to change things.” “I guess, I suppose, I think…” This guy is NOT a leader. A head coach and a leader picks out a game plan and they follow it through. The Cowboys will never be a disciplined team with “I guesses” when they need a guy like Peyton Manning. A great Manning story is that Jeff Saturday questioned him in practice his rookie year about a play and Manning’s response was “If I tell you it’s Easter you better damn well start looking for eggs!” That’s who the Cowboys need not captain mushy. Wade needs sunk.

2. Brad Childress - Minnessota Vikings
How the heck is this guy on the list? Easy, he believed in Tavarious Jackson and probably still does. There were quite a number of decent to good QB’s available in the off-season but Childress decided to stick with Jackson. That’s right, the leagues best RB, a very good offensive line, and an excellent defense is all lead by someone who can’t complete a 10 yard out to freaking Big Bird. Jackson could be decent down the road but the Vikings are 1 player away from a Super Bowl and that’s a good QB. Childress can redeem himself with a good pick up this off-season but I doubt it. Childress blew this.

1. Herm “OMG PLAYERS COACH” Edwards - Kansas City Chiefs
One might think that Edwards was the greatest coach in history when the Chiefs got him since they gave up a 4th round draft pick (used on the explosive and talented Leon Washington). Are you serious? How in the Hell does this guy pull the blinders out. Edwards could sell genuine fur coats to PETA. All of Edward’s success has been inherited. With the Jets Edwards went 10-6, 9-7, 6-10, 10-6, and 4-12. Bill Parcells was previously there and that is how Edwards managed to have the first two decent seasons. The other 10-6 was the equivalent of winning the lottery 5 times in a row. Edwards inherited Dick Vermeil’s team, the Chiefs, and went 9-7, 4-12, and 2-14. Man, that’s some great progress there coach. In addition, with all the fuss of him being a “Players Coach,” he has Gonzalez basically demanding a trade and Larry Johnson is next in line behind Chris Henry as the NFL’s leading Hoodlum. Herm “HAS GOT TO FRACKIN’ GO” Edwards.